Attention All Parents
Read Carefully
Your Kids May Be in Danger
It's been reported that there is a Gruffalo on the loose. He's about 6 feet tall and meets the following description. He has:
Terrible Tusks and Terrible Claws and Terrible Teeth in his Terrible Jaws
He has Knobbly Knees and Turned out Toes and a Poisonous Wart on the End of his Nose.
His Eyes are Orange and his Tounge is Black & he has Sharp Purple Prickels that Cover his Back.
He's been known to feast on Roasted Fox, Owl Ice-cream, and Scrambled Snake, so be sure that you're Foxes are brought indoors, your Owls are secure in their cages, and be sure you're snakes don't sliver too far away!
After sighting a Gruffalo on our back deck (and he must be a good climber because there are no stairs from the ground to our deck!!) we posted a sign on the Front Yard that says "No Gruffalos". It appears that the sign doesn't work because the Gruffalo is still trying to get in; however I've been informed that he has yet to enter our actual home because he refuzes to take his shoes off! (At least he has manners.)
We know for a fact that his only fear is a small field mouse that eats Gruffalo Crumble for breakfast (and nuts as his snack). We're desperately trying to reach this field mouse for his assistance. We're willing to offer free room and board, as long as he agrees to live in a secured cage (yes, Mommy is afraid of rodants - even if they do keep Gruffalos away).
Please be on the lookout for the Gruffalo in your area. It's also speculated that he may be accompanied by a witch, yes a real one, not just a kid in a costume, but that lead has yet to be verified.
Any leads on the Field Mouse's where-abouts should be sent to:
Olivia Preston
1234 Butterfly Room
Upstairs House, First Room on Right, 67890
